Hello, Failure

Of all the enemies of literature, success is the most insidious

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Failure of the Day: Discovered! A Way to Shop for Shoes That Is Not Fun

Here in Day 2 of bookstore rush week widowhood in conjunction with no work till next week underemployment, I am finding ways to keep myself occupied. I have taken it upon myself to research what kind of running shoe I need. I've been making do with my super cute Converse low tops, but I suspect I am not doing my arches any favors with those, especially since learning through the course of my research that I am an under-pronator. That means I've got a vaguely fucked up way of walking, which comes as no surprise to me or anyone else, but that apparently necessitates cushioned running shoes, or at least so sayeth the makers of said cushioned running shoes. I've got "It's A Scam" whistles and bells going off all over the place about that, but I'm frankly too delighted to be in the market for running shoes at all to be overly skeptical.

The unfortunate thing is that all running shoes are hideous. Could there be even one lime green pair? No. I could even settle for orange, but it turns out that runners are a serious and humorless lot; only white with gray or navy blue patterns on the sides will do. I am mightily puffed full of myself about needing these shoes, but every time I have to actually look at my choices, I am completely deflated.

And another thing—there's seems to be no getting around it: they're going to cost me about a hundred bucks, and that's just ridiculous. I tell you, it's a world gone mad…$100 for shoes that aren't even cute? Who the fuck do these running shoe people thing they're dealing with? Some sort of amateur? I didn't spend 2 years selling shitty $36 pumps downtown to be treated like this by New Balance and Adidas. It can't be that hard to take all that highly developed shoe design technology and create some thing attractive, can it?


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